The other day as I was looking in the mirror to put in my contact lenses, I realized that I look like Death. Really, the Grim Reaper. All black clothing? Check (yoga pants for the GR on the go). Extremely pale skin? Check (I get so little sun I could be a vampire, but not the sparkly kind). No make-up? Check (I haven’t been able to find most of it since OCDiva gave DH his “makeover”).Unkempt hair? Check (wow do I need to have a playdate with Miss Clairol). Ass kicking shoes? Check (well, running shoes, but hey, they worked for Buffy). Black, hooded, cape? Check (well, black track jacket, but hey, capes get caught on stuff). Scythe? Well, no (but my purse should qualify as a deadly weapon – big, and heavy with all the junk I carry around for the kids).
Was looking like Death a new thing for me? Was I just rocking the latest in Grim Reaper couture? Was I just setting a new trend among the SAHM set? Was this always how I looked? The answer to all of these questions is a resounding, “NO!”
In my pre-SAHM days, (when I worked in an office) I wore make-up, fixed my hair, only wore yoga pants on the weekends to go grocery shopping, and wore (gasp) high heels nearly every day! I had a closet full of cute shoes and cute clothing that I wore and accessorized and I enjoyed it! I colored my hair, I waxed things, and I plucked religiously. I was moderately glamorous. I cared about what I looked like. But something happened over the past 8 years, I had three more kids.
Is it that I don’t have time to color, pluck, wax, make up, and coif? Did I just get too lazy to wear “real” clothing? Is it that people spend so much time commenting on the beauty/cuteness of my kids that I just assume no one sees me? Is it that I just don’t care how I look anymore? I think that all of those things may be true. I think it may also be that like a lot of moms I don’t take time for myself.
In the evenings when I could wax, pluck, and color? Instead I check homework, wash uniforms, find mates to shoes, fill out field trip permission slips, and send emails as Head Room Mom. In the mornings when I should be coifing, putting on my face, and dressing in something other than athletic gear? I pack lunches and snacks, dispense medicine, find any random items needed (keys, hats, gloves, etc.) keep everyone on schedule, and shove them out the door on time. Of course, during the day I take care of the boys and the house (not a lot of beauty ritual time there).
Did I become complacent? Did I allow my children (and in all honesty my husband) to take over my life? Did I sacrifice my hotness/hipness/humanity in the pursuit of happiness for my children/husband? Yes, yes I did. But that is over! I am taking back my glam! I vow to not wait so long between hair cuts that my stylist is checking the paper for my obituary! I vow to wear something besides running shoes (or flip flops in warm weather) at least a few times a week! I vow to do the full “war paint” and coiffure for more than just church! Most important of all, I vow to take some time for myself each day!
Now excuse me while I go find my tweezers and a pair of my “FM Shoes” . . .